Shopping, chocolate and Cosmo


After days of eating clean and less than I did before (picnic on Friday doesn’t count – acting like you are on the diet at social events makes you being loke a person no one wants to invite, besides that: you have to have a “cheat day” once a week) I treated myself with a raw chocolate bar after dinner. I took just one piece first and almost changed my mind to eat it all, but I was still a little bit hungry and 150 calories is not too much, after all, my salad for dinner probably had them even less. I’m a chocoholic, there’s no doubt. 😉
Cosmopolitan is another thing I’m addicted to. So is Elle and other similar magazines. Unfortunatelly I read them in no time. The good thing is that blogs exist – they are like the same thing and you have new stuff to read all the time. So awesome.


I’m not really a shopping lover. In fact, I don’t even like it. I never liked to spend  hours at the malls in the shops trying the clothes on. I like many things, but I have no idea how to combine these stuff to look like I have a style. Anyway, I went shopping because I had no shorts at all. And I just gave away many old T-shirts, so I had to change my summer wardrobe. I bought two pairs of shorts and one black top.
My food today:
Breakfast: green smoothie and coffee with soy milk (around 300 kcal)
After workout: whey proteins (around 100 kcal)
Lunch: green salad with beans and greek yoghurt dressing, rice with peppers, tomatoes and eggplant (500-600 kcal (?) I have no feeling here how much it was)
Dinner: salad (lunch leftovers) (100 kcal) and raw chocolate bar (150 kcal)
All together – 1200 +/- 50 kcal (if my feeling for counting calories isn’t wrong)
I’ll try to write a review on book 80/10/10 tomorrow. 🙂
Good night :*


Differences between real hunger and psychological hunger

Stress, exhaust, sadness, anger, boredom, thurst are frequently connected with the need for biting something. We think we feel hungry all the time and we just grab something that we can eat quickly and then we want more and so we look for everything eatable around us. And bite and chew and lose the feeling of quantity and satiety and time. Not much later, we regret it all and promise to ourselves that this was the last time, but really really last. And then go to bed or stare in whatever screen we find something interesting on. It becomes a circle that is really hard to break. Stress – the need for consolation – “hunger” – eating – feeling of satisfy – feeling of guilt – the need for consolation again…

I think it happend to many people, almost to everyone. It’s not a big problem, if it happens occasionally. People, who are strong enough step back on the floor and don’t let it become a habit. If emotional eating becomes a part of someone’s life, however, it’s hard to overcome. It means thinking about food all the time and the need for eating appears after every feeling.

I used to have problems with emotional eating as well. It’s hard to say, if I overcame them completely, but it is absolutelly much better since I’m trying to accept myself.

Also, I started listening to my body and recognizing, when I really need food and when I just…want it. Here are some differences between real and psychological hunger:

  1. Real hunger doesn’t come suddenly. It comes gradually and it depends on the time passed from your last meal. The “false” hunger happens suddenly, it is not related to what or when did you eat before. You might not be hungry a moment ago, but right now you’d be killing for food.
  2. When you are seriously hungry, you don’t crave a specific food, while when you just have psychological hunger, you do. And this is usually not fruit or vegetables, normally you want sugar, fat or salt. I heard many times that hunger leads to overeating bad foods, but real hunger doesn’t lead to do this. Emotional hunger does. To discover, if I’m really hungry or not I use two tests: one is drinking a glass of water and waiting if hunger dissapears or not. Thurst is many time misinterpreted and we eat when we actually need water. It happend because the parts of the brain, responsible to recognize hunger and thurst, are so close to each other. Second thing I do is asking myself if I would eat an apple or a salad. If the answer is yes, then it is real hunger. If it’s no, it’s better to drink water and wait until it is time for your next meal.
  3. If you are hungry, you can wait like 30 more minutes (to do some tasks before or to cook). Contrary, if the hunger is emotional, you need certain food immediatelly. It seems you can’t wait a single minute.
  4. Psychological hunger is connected with certain situations like bad day at work, exam failure, love problems, family issues, stress, lack of sleeping etc. It is not connected with your body requiring fuel.
  5. Feeding is automatic, when you’re eating to satisfy your emotional hunger. You don’t really taste and enjoy your food, while when you’re really hungry, you are conscious all the time. You feel all the tastes, you feel the texture, you eat with all your senses.
  6. If you were really hungry, you know, when it’s time to stop eating. When you don’t feel hunger anymore, of course! In this case you consciously decide if you are going to eat the whole portion or less. If you eat, when you don’t really need the food, your body is confused, therefore it sends you wrong signals. That’s why you can’t stop eating.
  7. The feelings after you stop eating are different. When you didn’t eat because you were hungry, you ate “bad” food, you ate too much and of course you don’t feel well. You feel guilty, which leads you…well, you know how it goes. When you eat because of the phisical need, you don’t feel any guilt when you finish your meal. Eating is something normal and necessary.

Keep in mind: love yourself first. You control your food, don’t let the food controlling you.

Beside my experiences, I used this post as a source. I reccomand to all Slovene speaking readers to take a look. The author is a nice raw vegan girl, who has really good ideas and recipes. The webpage is in Slovene, but I summarized this post here. 🙂


Wednesday – weigh in, women’s issues, workout and what I ate

These days I am eating quite well, without many extra calories from sweets or fat. My workouts are regular, not any less intensive as they were. I drink lots of water and green tea. So, it seems I’m doing everything right, aren’t I? Of course, I didn’t expect my weight to go straight back to 41 kg over night, but the number I saw this morning, shocked me. My weight should be between 44 and 45 kg, but today the scale showed 46 (!). I was not wearing clothes and I had weight in before I ate or drank. So I decided, my dinner today would be a few laps of running. Later I realized I got period today, but I didn’t think this could cause so much extra weight. I mean, I don’t have 1 liter of blood to lose… Still, I checked if there is a connection between period and weight gain and I found out that it’s actually normal to have from 0.5 to 10 pounds more than usual. The main reason is that body stores more water this time. Read about it more precisely here:

After that, I didn’t feel so upset any more. So, I’ll repeat weigh in next week and see the difference.

I was at the gym nearly 1 hour and a half, I was doing pull-ups, dips, some byceps and tryceps exercises with weights and push-ups and planks for finish. At the evening I also went for a run (I kept my promise from the morning). I did just 7 laps, which is 7 km. With some stops to drink. I was running slowly, nearly 45 minutes. The length was 1/3 of my record (half marathon this April). It should be piece of cake for me, but it was not. Maybe because the sun was too strong (despite it was cold in the morning after yesterday’s rainstorm) or because I was training legs the day before or because my new headphones were disturbing me. Anyway, my workout was still much better than the one of people, who were sitting on the couch, drinking cheap lager and eating chips, pizza or gummy bears. 😀

Many girls complain they crave sweets all the time, when they have period or PMS (fortunatelly I don’t have this thing). But I wasn’t hungry at all today. Total energy value of the food I ate today was around 1000 calories. And it was low in sugar.

My food diary 24 June 2015


MyFitnessPal said: “If every day were like today… You’d weigh 40.5 kg in 5 weeks” 🙂

Have a good night and sweet dreams! 🙂

New logo


I was thinking of drawing the new logo for my page on my own. I really did create something. It’s not perfect, though. Maybe I should take more time to do it or learn how to edit the pictures on computer – honestly, I have no practise with it. But still, if you like it, I would put it on. Here it is, just tell me how you like it.

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I believe in the blerch

The blerch is a fat little cherub who follows me when I run. He is a wretched, lazy beast. He tells me to slow down, to walk, to quit.”

If you know The Oatmeal, you must also know who is this blerch. If  you have no idea, what am I talking about see the website: You’re gonna have sooo much fun reading the comics. I just read the book: The terrible and wonderful reasons why I run long distances. I suggest you to read it if you like running and also if you don’t (especialy if you don’t), I was dying of laughter while reading 😀

Actually it’s not just about running, it’s about suffering, pleasure, escaping everyday life (going straight to nirvana part), the feeding and the blerch with its “excellent” advice for eating, pardon – fueling and resting.

There are two things I liked the most. The first is the author’s description of the treadmill and what a perfect invention they are – for those who hate the outdoors and prefer starring at the walls or television. I hate the treadmills, too. I can’t understand people, who come to the gym (probably by car) and walk on this torture machine for an hour. It is not even close to running. The second part are his thoughts of food. It’s like reading my thoughts, sometimes: “I overeat because food tastes good, but more importantly I do it because it feels good. It’s a nine minute vacation. It’s a short dip into a shallow pool of chewing, tasting and swallowing…” Comparing overeating with drug addiction makes sense. It actually is an addiction – my opinion is, it is worse than drug, alcohol, cigarette or any other. We need food for living, we eat every day and so we beat the addiction harder. Food can be the medicine or the poison.

This blerch must be real, he must be also following me sometimes or anyone of you. Just try to shut him up.

So much for today, I was planning to continue my post with the differences between real hunger and psycological hunger, but it’s time to go to sleep. I hate being in front of the computer late at night, lack of sleeping or not sleeping on proper time can make you fat.

That’s all folks! Good night 🙂

“Sometimes it’s all you need to wear”

Does it sound any familiar to you? Remember who said this? Let me refrash your memory: Christina Aguilera perfume

Yesterday I didnn’t write any post. I was working at the cosmetic shop as a perfume promoter. One of the perfumes on discount was Christina’s – although I am not a fan of perfumes made by celebtities (I mean models and singers), that one is not bad at all. I was even wearing it when I was working. It was not the only thing I was wearing, obviousely 🙂 (the time to wear only the perfume came later, after work was done – now you know why was I too busy at the evening to write :D)

I was wearing black T-shirt and black trousers and nice jewellery at work. I actually felt beautiful that time, probably because of all black clothes on me and beautiful make-up. Black was kind of dress code.


The work was less boring that I thought, some costumers were really funny, especially older ladies – sometimes they don’t stop talking 😀 Even when there was anyone interested in perfumes, I found something to do – walking around and smelling all perfumes that attracted me – pour homme et pour femme – I liked some of male perfumes so much that I would even like to wear them 😀

Today I went to the gym in the morning and my leg day was not easy, but I still had the power to do these 45 burpees for finish. I’ve been eaten clean since Friday or Thursday, I drink a lot of water and green tea, my trainings are still regular and a little bit harder, so this shouldn’t be happened according to all the logic…it’s contradictory….the scale showed 46 kg (I’ve never been that fat since I was 17). Normally my weight is between 44 and 45 kg, last year it was 43 kg….I don’t understand it. Yesterday I didn’t eat more than 1000 kcal (I think it was even nearly 900). I’ll say the thing I said already few 100 times before: I’ll keep eating clean, I’ll not eat more than 1200 calories, I’ll workout at least 5 times a week, this time I will really follow all of this, without chocolate attacks.

P.S. Today there was I.B.F.F. competition in my town – these guys covered with brown skin colour are sooooo hilarious 😀

A day to almost call it perfect

I think I should be quite proud of myself today, once for a change I have reasons to be(exept for Saturday’s brilliant discover to change my thoughts to change my life

  1. I already told you about my English exam, the one I almost didn’t have enough time to finish. I may be a slow writer, but my English is good enough for the highest grade. And I got another 10 (we have grades from 1 to 10, 6 needed to pass) in another subject, but it’s not official yet.
  2. My workout was intensive enough, I felt great doing it, I had no fear how would I look like, if I stop going to fitness from any reason, but I just kept doing pull-ups and push-ups and lifting hand weights, I was there for 1 and a half hour, I was thinking about finishing, but I was still full of energy, so I did 50 burpees as the last exercise.
  3. I got a new part time job! It’s just for July, but still better than no job or job that I would hate. I’ll work as a waitress in a small restaurant, where they also serve student meals (also healthy options and many vegetarian or vegan dishes).
  4. I never liked to practise playing musical instruments (we must play them at the faculty). But today I grabbed the block flute and played.
  5. I was quite successful with the food. I tried to eat just a little carbs, and the success has last until now. All together I ate nearly 1200 kcal. More details here: wpid-screenshot_2015-06-18-21-23-20.png wpid-screenshot_2015-06-18-21-23-29.png

My food diary 18 June 2015

It seems that I ate way too much fat, but, if you decrease your carbs, it is logical that the % of protein and fat increase (all together always makes 100 % – the book 80/10/10 explains this thing very well). This ratio changed a little bit now, because I just couldn’t do without something sweet and I ate a raw coconut & cocoa bar which has 148 kcal, 20.9 g of carbs and 7.8 g of fat. It’s one of the best I ever tried. Look for this:   🙂

Oh, yes, the reason why I put the word “almost” in the title – I missed something fun or special to happen. I missed someone to make me laugh, to talk with me, someone to spend my time with doing just anything…

Thanks to all of you, who follow my blog. XOXO 🙂

What I ate wednesday

Hi, beautifuls 🙂

It’s wednesday and after two days of not working out, its W is perfect extra reason to do it today. I am starting to lose my motivation and I feel really bored working out alone, though. But the feeling when it’s done is absolutely worth everything. 🙂

I also remembered to track the food I ate today using Myfitnesspal application. According to me, it’s the best application for keeping food diary and counting calories and nutrients. You can find it here:

I decided to try carb cycling. It goes like this: 2 days low carb, 1 day normal, 2 days low, 1 day high (with cheat meal), 1 day normal. And again. I’ll try and I’ll see if it is not too hard to follow. Today it supposed to be low carb…okay, I wasn’t 100 % successful, raw protein bar and the cranberries in trial mix contain much sugar. And no, I won’t start my day without a smoothie with banana. 😀

Not bad, but it could be better, because I got slightly over the limit:  My today’s diary (hope it works)

wpid-screenshot_2015-06-17-23-14-36.pngHere are nutrient details


…and my low carb lunch (and it was totally without animal products! I still eat cheese, yoghurt and eggs occasionally, though.) It’s zucchini (I’ll have them at least two more days… I made tons of them. But I have no problems eating them every day.), grilled tofu, lettuce leaves and spicy chilli sauce from chinese. 🙂

Sweet dreams 🙂

The day of zucchini and hummus

After a long time not spent in the home kitchen, I spent my afternoon there today. We had a lot of zucchini at home, because my grandma gave them to us and I didn’t know that, so I bought them on the market as well. So there were really so many of them that they couldn’t even fit in the fridge. I’ve cooked them and tomorrow I’ll probably eat them with rice and tofu. I left four to grill them another day or eat them raw. For todays lunch I grated one zucchini and put then in an omlette with an egg, onion, rosemary and a pinch of curcuma. I also put tomato and parmesan cheese on the plate. It was a delicious summer mediterean lunch 🙂


Later I made hummus. I haven’t made it since I was in Turkey last year. Last time I bought in the store, but I prefer it homemade by me. I bought canned chickpeas and tahini (whenever I want to buy tahini I wish I was in Turkey – they have it so cheap). I love it spicy, but today I kept it plain. I noticed there are some people from India, who saw my blog, I’ll write a short message for them: Hello, people from India! I love your cuisine so much!!! 🙂

Usually I eat hummus with carrots, I did the same for today’s dinner.

It almost seems like a good day, but it wasn’t really. Actually it looked like I would ruin my day overeating all the crap in the house. I don’t know why I had to put a spoon in Nutella this morning, it’s disgustingly sweet and the label clearly shows there is nothing good inside and my fat will never disappear that way, but it’s sooo addictive that it’s just impossible to stop. I’ll never buy it anyway, my sister likes to eat it, so there is always a jar in the house. And there are always cookies. Also for me to steal when nobody’s watching. But I haven’t eaten nothing from 8 am to 3 pm, just to let my body saying itself, when it’s really time to eat. Sounds wierd, but I make the healthiest options when I feel a little hungry. I eat “bad” foods only when I’m not hungry anymore.

There was no opportunity to workout today. My morning was busy because of an exam (I bought morning fitness membership card), the weather was moore or less rainy, so I couldn’t exercise outside and there were my family at home after lunch (I feel wierd working out, when someone is home). I’ll go to the gym tomorrow, I’ll be training double as hard 😉

I just seen today it was the best day for likes on my blog. Yeeeeeeey!!! 😀 Looks like my complaining in the previous post was helping me (?) 😀

Sweet dreams, guys 🙂

Problems of a blogging beginner

Hello, it’s me again 🙂 Yes, my blog is still alive, I haven’t been active for a while again for study reasons etc. I’m ok, but I’ve been already better…I’m becoming depressed again, feeling I can’t control myself while eating, sometimes I still feel disgusting, however I have a feeling that it can dissapear after time, I would make it. It is not easy to accept myself after years of being unaccepted… I’ll do my best.

Anyway, I’ve spent some time checking out popular blogs about health, food, fitness and stuff I’d like to write about. It’s hardly possible for me to have a few 1000 followers and so high popularity that I could get rich from that, it’s not the reason I’m writing for, anyway, but I would still like some more people reading me.

There are quite many problems with increasing my visibility. I’m not really good with tecnology and today it took me really long to costumize my website. (You can see I changed it a little bit – my previous theme made it a little bit hard to orientate. As a beginner I’m still getting to know how the things work.) I’m also slow while I’m writing, cause I need to translate my thoughts and put them in order and I always look for the connection of the sentences and I forget what I wanted to tell or don’t know how to tell…

Also these famous blogger girls write about fasion and beauty stuff. I have no sense of fashion, I just wear…..just clothes. They may look good on me sometimes, but not always. I would like to know how to choose my outfits better, but I never take time to think about it. I wear make up every day – pretty much always the same, I wear jewellery when I don’t forget to put it on… I am the last person in the world who could write anything about beauty and fashion, unfortunatelly.

I was thinking about focusing more on book reviews (books about healthy food and diets (i.e. lifestyles also) I’ve already mentioned I was reading 80/10/10) and cooking (but there might be problems with lack of time, lack of ideas, small kitchen and my family who wouldn’t eat the things I make – they don’t like food they are not used to eat almost every week. And my fear of my greed and overeating).

As I said, writing for practice and for myself may be good for me. About the blog – we’ll see where can it lead me to.

Good night